How can you remain in your gratitude while asking for more out of life? This is a question I’ve asked myself because, while I am incredibly grateful for all that I have in my life, I do want more. I want more financial security. I want a loving, romantic relationship. I want to live more expansively. Is that being selfish or ungrateful? I struggled with finding the balance.
This topic of conversation came up today as Eryn and I enjoyed a morning brunch together. We both were intrigued by the subtle, “small” synchronicities happening in our lives at the time. We’ve learned to acknowledge these synchronicities as forward movement in our lives, and yet, we wanted to manifest more.
Later that day, when we Invited our spiritual guides to join in on the conversation, Khaled arrived to share spirit’s perspective on manifesting and creating one’s reality. He laid out, point by point, how the ego[1] limits us, how to overcome this limitation to actively manifest more in our lives, and described what he calls the “yes! and more …” method. He then walked us through an exercise to activate “magic and abundance” for us both.
Looking back nine months later, Eryn manifested a promotion and almost tripled her salary. She is being recognized for her professional talents and has deepened her romantic relationship. I signed a financially substantial 5-year contract with a client, was asked to facilitate a team-building exercise with 200+ people (I wanted a larger “platform” for my coaching) and I’m seeing some movement in the “romance” area of my life! Was it a result of this activating exercise? A change in our perspective? Our initiative and efforts? Perhaps it is all of the above…
Here’s the transcript of our conversation with Khaled. For those of you who prefer cliff notes, you can download this summary, which lists all the important take-aways.
Do you want more out of your life? I hope you read this, reflect on it, follow the prompts that are offered here to answer how it applies to your life, and begin to manifest whatever your heart desires!
Khaled: Greetings Mesdamnes! It is your loving, special K in perpetuity!
[He moves the planchette in circular motions, very quickly and energetically. We both remove the pillows supporting our arms.]
Elena: He wants us to get toned. Getting a workout here!
Khaled: Stirring up the energy, cranking up the co-created energy field.
Elena: We can’t be rested on pillows with Khaled!
Khaled: No rest for the wicked. [Eryn and I laugh]
Elena: Hello!
Khaled: My dearest Elena!
Elena: Yes, hi!
Khaled: Excited, thrilled are we to reconnect with our most beautiful curious! [“Curious Elena” is a loving nickname he has for me.]
Elena: Thank you so much. I am equally thrilled and very, very happy!
Khaled: Let us then pick up the thread as was earlier discussed—as it relates to both of your queries—synchronicity and abundance. Your ability to experience then at different amplitudes is related to the allowance with which you surround them. Example—one would see a stark difference between the person who finds a 10 dollar bill on the street and the individual who wins 126 million dollars in the lottery, indeed who manifests the business which grows exponentially—yet, from the perspective of the universe, these are all equal, only defined by the scale of allowance.
Elena: We need to level up our scale.
Khaled: To use a cliché—energetically and consciously, you are each like goldfish. This means…that your size relative to your reality is largely dictated by how big or small the tank of your energetic consciousness[2] is. When the small goldfish finds itself in a larger tank, it grows to fill the available space. Therefore, the work connected to this manifestation of reality is to continually stretch and expand the perimeter of the tank to allow the size of your manifestation to grow. In essence, the mechanisms of synchronicity and abundance are always at work within and around you, it is a question of scale. Will you feel safe to be dropped into an aquarium when you all have only known a small goldfish bowl?
Elena: Do you have specific tips or ways that are relatable to me or Eryn that we can expand consciously into a very large aquarium? Or….why not the ocean?
Khaled: Yes. A few things, first… [he lays out these 10 universal truths, point by point]
Our reality is merely a reflection of our beliefs and imaginings.
- Khaled: The universe is in a constant state of expansion. This means, that there is not only enough but there is always more available. The essential consciousness of the universe and its love for all means that conscious love wants more for you.
- Khaled: The microcosmic journey of the soul is one of seeking, exploration and acquisition—allowance by way of expansion and expansion by way of allowance. Your journey to expand soul will naturally include the expansion of your reality.
- Khaled: Your mind is put in place as a limiting force for your soul to existentially strain against—to borrow dear cookie’s yoga [“Cookie of Wisdom” is the affectionate nickname he uses for Eryn]—the practice is one of expanding the experience of the physical tests and binds, and in so doing, the body is made stronger, more flexible and expanded in its being.
The soul recognizes that it must incarnate with the constraints of the brain and its attached ego to define the parameters of the exercise which will bring the most expansion. This means that the expansion and greatest manifestation cannot be received in the ego but rather through the alchemic transformation of its field into the great nothingness of pure allowance.
Elena: Is that what I’ve been listening to with Joe Dispenza? Is his recommendation of what he outlines accurate in terms of explaining the quantum field?
Khaled: Yes. But try not to get too technical. - Khaled: To seek to create through the ego is to seek out further limitation. Elena, you are noticing “little synchronicities” happening around you, it is not that you are suddenly activating small magics but rather that your ego is currently comfortable receiving small magics. In a sense you’ve always been in the 8 inch fishbowl and now you are seeing it grow to a 10 inch fishbowl, neglecting to see that both bowls are in the ocean!
Elena: I understand that concept. But I’d like to clarify one thing. I want to acknowledge these synchronicities from a place of gratitude. In doing so, is that somehow counterproductive? Is it keeping me in that 8 inch fishbowl? Or does asking for more negate gratitude?
Khaled: No - Khaled: Seeking more must be done through the lens of gratitude, love and connection to all that is. Otherwise, the consciousness is manifesting through the ego, and it will only manifest limitation of another kind—number 5!
Elena: Okay, so taking the example of this recent connection with a friend about leading a webinar…I recognize that maybe it’s a 10” bowl, but I also want to acknowledge with gratitude that this is some kind of movement! How can I embrace that gratitude, yet, ask for more? - Khaled: The “yes! and …” method. You receive a small magic—this is your perception of size by the way, but for the sake of discussion—you acknowledge it, you feel the magic, you truly feel it. Now, activate the feeling. Strip it of its physical trappings, what is it saying beneath? Receive this in its nondescript form, let it grow large and nonspecific. Let universal love penetrate its energetic envelope, grow the feeling as large as you will allow yourself to feel it—then say…yes, and more!
[We talk about this recent connection mentioned earlier as an example. By stripping down the specifics, the meaning of it was “the universe is sending me support and encouragement for my coaching.” We also discuss how our souls have consciously chosen our “fishbowls” to define the scope by which we will expand and acquire experience. I mention how I used to be a dreamer as a young child but was told by my parents to “get my head out of the clouds,” “keep your feet on the ground” and “be realistic.” My parents’ pragmatism began to define my fishbowl where dreams are only dreams, and life was just about hard work, living within my means and following a path they laid out for me.] - Khaled: Magic has no size only the limitation with which you feel safe to experience it. And this is equally true for abundance.
- Khaled: There is a part of you that has no such limitations as your ego—your soul and higher self. Knowing the undertaking ahead, your soul constantly seeds your reality with resources to balance the limitation of the ego. Taking an inventory of your experiences, often in childhood, will often reveal the antidote to the ego‘s limitation.
Elena: So in this regard, is the resource for me to allow myself to be that big dreamer? Using my imagination…thinking that ‘anything is possible.’ I mean, what is reality anyway?
Khaled: It is a reflection of your beliefs and imaginings. - Khaled: Where you are inhabiting the undefined allowance, great manifestings of limitless scale are possible. The more your consciousness enters this field, the more you are inhabiting the essence of your soul.
- Khaled: The work to receive more expands the journey of the soul, feeding into the cosmic expansion of the universe. Your quest for more expands the allowance for more for the collective consciousness of which you are each an integral part. There is nothing, no love, no magic, no abundance, no safety, no joy that you receive that is not given to your neighbor. The more you create and expand in this way, the more your “more” feeds the water table that nourishes all that experience you. When we say that you are each a gift, each a gift unto each other—this is our full meaning. This is the greatest act of love, to create and to share that which you create in this reality and in all realities.
Elena: It’s a great way to look at it for those who need to overcome beliefs that wanting unlimited abundance is selfish, etc.!
Will you feel safe to be dropped into an aquarium when all you have only known is a small goldfish bowl?
Khaled: So, given these ten points, we are checking on each of your fishbowls.
Elena: With all of this in mind, I can see how I’ve been limiting myself. When I look at the abundance of other people, there is something in me that says “that’s not in the cards for me.” Or in relationships, I think “having a loving, lasting relationship is something I won’t experience in this lifetime.” At my age now, there’s a part of me that doesn’t believe this to be a possibility.
Eryn: So knowing that’s your fishbowl, what is the compensatory experience to push through this…what is giving you a resource to push through and expand and what does that look like?
Elena: What comes to my mind in terms of relationships is “Robert,” who has showed up in my life. But he’s not “the one” is he?
Khaled: Strip the exterior.
Elena: He is someone who is showing me that he cares. He is attentive…that it’s all about me…someone who’s available. And I’ve recognized and appreciated that. I’ve thought “Oh, this is a new experience that I haven’t had in a long time.” Even though he’s not the right person, the universe is showing me that this is a possibility.
Eryn: So how do you apply the “yes, and” technique to that?
Elena: It’s acknowledging how this feels, that it feels good to be in that energy. I need to let it in and allow that emotion or feeling to grow, and then say “yes, now bring on ‘the one’!” And in terms of my recent synchronicities…it’s showing me that people…friends and business colleagues…are seeking me out. That feels different. It is usually me that takes the initiative and pursues the get together, meeting or business opportunity. Stripping out the details, I think the message is, “people are seeking me out.” After taking that in with gratitude and allowing that feeling of being valued, wanted and sought out to grow large…I say to the universe, “yes, and more…!”
Khaled: Cookie?
Eryn: I think my fishbowl is how I’m feeling in my career … it’s wanting that expansion and the abundance and financial security that comes with it. It’s engagement and growth and transformation.
Khaled: Where is the magic?
Eryn: The magic is, if I were to acknowledge some things I’ve been receiving lately, it’s the expansion of my roles/tasks from the year prior. My boss got me a promotion and a pay bump. And, this new boss is manifesting that mentor role I’ve been looking for.
Khaled: Created!
Elena: Yes, what you created! So how can you then take that and use the “yes, and…” technique?
Eryn: Striping out the exterior of it, the universe is showing me that I created the expansion and I’m creating more financial abundance through my role. I’m being recognized by the two people I work with and experiencing the value of a mentor/mentee relationship in that way. I feel I have to get more granular with it. [Eryn struggles with saying more.]
Khaled: It is okay to be independent, to be the alpha and omega of manifesting your reality.
Elena: What do you think he means by that Eryn?
Eryn: Well that underneath all of this, the message is that it’s okay to be independent.
Elena: For some reason, I feel it has something to do with the mentor/ mentee relationship you talk about…yes, it’s something you’ve been seeking but maybe you don’t need it. Your success doesn’t hinge on a mentor that is going to shepherd you through and champion your career. Is that what you were getting at Khaled?
Khaled: Yes.
Elena: I know you’ve wanted that…
Khaled: Independence does not equate isolation.
Eryn: That gets me emotional …
Elena: So you’ve equated independence with isolation?
Eryn: Yes, I feel my throat tighten even thinking about that.
Elena: That’s really important for you to look at.
Eryn: I’ve felt independent but very alone in that.
Khaled: And this feeds into you, Elena, who has never been supported in a relationship. Your abundance has come through an isolating self reliance bordering on isolation.
Elena: So are you saying there is an interdependent relationship energetically? So my not feeling supported in a relationship and having to do everything on my own…
Lauren: Any relationship…
Elena: Oh, apart from romantic? So even in business relationships?
Khaled: Business partnerships.
Eryn: He’s talking about anytime you’ve shared a business with someone…
Elena: Yes that’s been very true. It’s always been out of balance, where I’m bringing to the table much more than the other. And this experience has confirmed why I need to be self reliant. I understand that for me, but how does that translate to Eryn?
Khaled: Through her observation, your energy, and karmic relationships.
Eryn: When I think about how that impacts me on a financial level, it feeds into this idea of not really stepping into adulthood, and not being able to take care of myself.
Khaled: And yet, you do. This is a fantasy that enables you to receive connection from the wounded child framework.
Elena: Instead of coming from a place of empowerment, right?
Khaled: Yes. Remember that wish of the wounded child—“when I grow up, I’ll move away to where no one knows me or can hurt me.” If you never step into the empowered woman that you are who manifests unscalable magic, opportunity and abundance, you will never have to leave your family behind.
Elena: One is not dependent on the other. You can be successful, independent and can still have a deep connection with me and everyone else in the family.
Khaled: And you can enjoy the deep and loving connections and relationships that are not responsible for your success but can support your growth. All that is yours has come from you. Yes, and … more!
Eryn: Thank you Khaled!
Khaled: You are both so treasured for this loving and honest work that you do. We offer this moment in deep acknowledgement of this.
[He ‘swishes’ love to each of us with the planchette.]
Khaled: Now, we build up the magical pot—the cauldron to activate magic and abundance for you both! Get ready to throw your desires in—let them be big!
[He moves the planchette vigorously in circles around the board…like stirring a cauldron. We then take turns spontaneously stating with enthusiasm all our desires.]
Elena: An incredible gorgeous, sexy, beautiful man who loves me and who is there for me, who values me and truly sees me and supports my expansiveness. Yes and more!
Eryn: Exponential career growth that utilizes my passion, my creativity, my value and my intelligence, my unique love that I have and share with everyone I meet…a career that will pay me a ton of money with no limit that could double, triple and quadruple my abundance…that can come in any which way I want it to…that’s not limited to money but anything in this world I am willing and ready to receive.
Elena: Incredible vitality, good health, flexibility, yes…youthfulness…physical strength.
Eryn: The enjoyment of everyday living, the deliciousness of food and drinking, and joy and laughter and experiences and deep friendships. Enjoying moments with strangers.
Elena: Deep, deep intimate connection with others on every level and in every way, personal and business. More travel to foreign countries with incredible beauty and different cultures. I want to be a sponge and really enjoy that.
Eryn: Yes, all of that, and I want adventure and mystery and surprises and magic. I want to receive joyfully and with ease and to experience things that have meaning and that nourish my soul.
Elena: I truly want to be living every day with purpose, meaning, fulfillment and connection to myself, the world, and with my guides. I want to expand my experience and relationships with all of you. I want to be well compensated for my coaching .. that this be my life’s work. I want to be acknowledged for this work and have a much larger stage; to be seen and supported by it and to really have impact on other people’s lives.
Eryn: You know what comes to me? What I want for you is to be seen and acknowledged and rewarded for being the dreamer that you’ve always been!
Elena: Thank you sweetheart. And I want for you to break out of anything that is holding you back from your artistic gifts and talents…for you to unleash your creativity and to be uninhibited in that regard.
Eryn: I want to express myself creatively and express my value without any second thought and have it be completely authentic and joyful to experience.
Elena: In all of this, I want to have a close relationship with my son, daughter-in-law and grandson…I want there to be so much love and connection and ease and acknowledgement and time and experiences. I want that to happen organically.
Eryn: I want to really embrace, own and step into my beauty and let my exterior and interior connect and feel unlimited in their strength, beauty and flexibility.
Elena: I want financial abundance, I not only want to feel secure and safe, I also want to be able to help others.
Eryn: That was mine! I want to receive all the abundance in any form so I can share that with other people, so I can improve the quality of life for those around me. I want to be a conduit for abundance so that others can experience joy and ease with no limitations.
Elena: I want to experience the beauty of humanity, of our incredible planet (that makes me emotional), I want to promote its beauty and appreciation of our planet. I want to live the expression of the beauty of life.
Eryn: I want to honor all the moments that we have and appreciate the rare privilege of being alive here and now…appreciating all the animals, humans, plant life…I want to experience the beauty of just being here.
Khaled: Drink it in! [He gives us a few minutes to soak up the emotion and feeling of what we stirred up!]
Khaled: “Yes, and….!”
[He then moves the planchette over the word ‘Goodbye’ and departs.]
[1] Ego is that portion of the human personality which is experienced as the “self” or “I” and is in contact with the external world through perception.
[2] Consciousness in terms of awareness—and in its active energetic aspect—our life-energy.